But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
