flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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