weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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