Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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