Are my feet made of real feet?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
this hospital has no fireball
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
