She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Farmville is her only friend.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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