Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
