i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
