Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
