porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
He passed out mid-signature
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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