He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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