i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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