Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize