Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize