Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
