So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
