8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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