so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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