If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
