people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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