How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize