I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Last time i carry you out of a forest
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
