whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
