He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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