He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
