Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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