I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
