I puked a lego.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
