some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
