we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
