Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

wrigley field is MILF paradise

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(281): View more from Texas

I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent

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(804): View more from Virginia

If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..

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(248): View more from Michigan

When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.

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(626): View more from California

Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.

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(785): View more from Kansas

Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.

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(216): View more from Ohio

I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

Do you have feelings for this penis?

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(713): View more from Texas

You threw up everything but your ovaries.

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