What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
