If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
