White coat. Heels.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
