if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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