You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
We got so high we made milksteak
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
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