Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
