Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
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