Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
