Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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