here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Acid is not a monday night drug
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
How naked do you want me to be?
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