dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
