We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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