Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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