So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
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