I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
