Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
