Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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