i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
