how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
